A greater degree of self-empowerment can come from the way we look at things. We might not be able to change our life circumstances straight away, but we might well be able to immediately change the manner in which we perceive events, which will positively impact the experience we’re having, including our emotional and mental wellbeing. Moreover, the memories we’ll have about the experience in the future will also be more positive. Here’s an example. My life has been punctuated by periods of what I used to call isolation. This indicates times when my life appears to be going no-where, as if the existential button were on pause and all doors are closed, no matter what I try to do or how positive I endeavour to be. I gradually came to realise that these periods, in what I labelled my isolation unit, have given me the opportunity to discover more about my self – my human-spiritual constitution. Ok, good, at least I was able to see the situation as in some way benefiting me, but I still felt it to be painful and in some way unjust. It was only recently that the next click came and I began to perceive these moments of withdrawal from busy, everyday life as a retreat.
Already the new label – retreat as opposed to isolation – gave a totally different nuance to the experience. Continue reading →
I made what I’ll call a mistake for many years to think that the goal was to work through all my emotions; basically, to contemplate the root cause of them and then try to defuse them any time I was being bombarded by negative thoughts and rushing fear, guilt, anger, etc. This is all well and good; however, now I’ve come to the conclusion that it could take me a whole life time to work through just this life’s emotional baggage – maybe if I really focus, I could tackle one or two previous lives also (!); but I’ll never get through it all and unless I hit the saint button pretty soon I’m going to carry on experiencing challenges and maybe even traumas in my life that will lead to more things to work through to avoid the accumulation of freshly generated emotional triggers. Bottom line, no point trying to plug an emotional dam with your finger. Perhaps part of the working through of our emotional dragons involves simply recognising they exist and accepting that they’re a part of us, while at the same time keeping our minds focused on more inspired thoughts; thereby, removing the sting out of the dragon’s tail.
So often, I’ve had the impression that I’m going about my daily business with my head totally in the clouds, wrapped up in the thoughts and chimeras of the monkey, rational mind. I could be walking in the most stunning landscape and yet afterwards I can hardly recall what I saw, heard, felt, etc. It’s as if my sensitivity has been on low or mute for years now. The older I get i.e. the further from my childhood, the blunter my sensations. I’m disturbed to find that external visual/aural stimuli don’t touch me deeply enough to hold my focus. The rational mind is overpowering – like a self-proclaimed master dominating a serf (the whole self). I feel this is the outcome of conventional living, even though my life has been far from mainstream. Still, I’m bombarded by the standards, prejudices, social constructs, etc. of my society, which all urge me to be serious, curtail my instinctual drives, compete in the dog-eat-dog world, show how intellectually clever I am, be a good woman, etc. Continue reading →